Parenting Humor

8 Kids for 6 Days: A Dad’s Perspective (Day 3)

8 kids for 5 days, a dad's perspective - day 3

Captain’s log, Day 3, February 2nd, Year of our Lord 2018.

The previous day’s activities have functionally tired them out.  I made it through my entire coffee and prayer time with no interruption.

Alas, the tiredness is having an effect on awakedness.  X claims that he takes longer to wake up than Curly because his brain is bigger and it takes longer to warm up.  I am dubious.

The young crewmembers have all come down for breakfast.  The commissary is now out of frozen waffles.  This is troublesome.  What shall we feed them tomorrow?  They will be most ravenous and we have nothing with which to quench their hunger.

Red tells me she has never been dropped off at the academy this late before.  We decide to head to the cafeteria.  I turn to look for X and when I turn around Red is gone.  A nearby teacher tells me she saw her go into the breakfast, but she frowns at me severely when I try and join the line.  Who is Red that random teachers recognize her?  I can only assume that she is a troubled child.  I will keep a wary eye on her.

Queen Matron has decided to drop Curly and Spunky at their mini-academy so she can go house shop with Grand Matron.  Curly is fraught with worry.  Will Queen Matron return to get him soon?  He is reassured.

The afternoon was uneventful.

I arrived at the academy again to pick up X and Red.  X lamented that I come from so far away because they are always the last ones to be picked up.

There is some sort of gala at the church tonight.  Fathers and Daughters are to be the only guests.  Against my better judgement, I have decided to take all five of my female youngling crewmembers.

There were many other crews there with their female younglings.  The dancing was rather peculiar.

The teen age crew that is there sing along to one of the songs that is played. I have never heard this song before. LG appears to know the words and all the dance moves.  Where could she have learned these things?  This turn of events has me befuddled and concerned.

The gala in general was extremely fulfilling, and lots of fun.

As the youngling crewmembers and I were heading to the door, Spunky notified me that she had, in fact, peed.  She had not left my side this whole time, so I could only assume that this was an accident.  Upon examining her pants, yes, she had peed.

Important note to remember for a later date: Legs that have been peed on, then wiped down with paper towels, water, and baby wipes are still damp.  Trying to get leggings on a 2 year old with damp legs, in a bathroom stall, in a men’s restroom is an incredibly poor tactical decision.  Why have I not run into this experience in the past, and I vow that it will not be repeated.

We return to our living quarters none-the-worse.

Despite the later hour, Queen Matron had allowed the male younglings to stay awake.  Odd, but one cannot override the Queen Matron.

Bedtime was frenetic.  WTF are these children doing?

Red has jumped on X’s wee-wee spot for some reason.  I can’t find Spunky’s luggage.  The Kyd is still in her party clothes, Blondie is complaining about the heat, Curly is in the bathroom and won’t come out because X was trying to “tag him”.

The younglings are all in bed with the lights off.

Spunky is still wide awake.

The Kyd and Blondie are wide awake.

Bed time was a little more difficult.  Spunky asked when she could go to her regular living quarters and see the Momma Fanta and the Pale Rider.  I had to tell her that they would be gone for a couple more days.  I don’t think she understands the time, but she was sad.

Tomorrow is another day.

In case you missed them, here are Day 1 and Day 2.

Sandra Samoska is a writer with a love for Jesus and a love for family. When she's not chasing around her four kids and doing all the things, you can find her writing about the ways God shows up in our every day lives.

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